Taste of Kiwi: Blog of Author Shelley Munro

I’ve been reading non-fiction books about relationships again as a form of research. Without fail I come across interesting tidbits and germs of ideas for stories. Yesterday I was reading Hot Love – How To Get It by Tracey Cox, and she had an amusing list of some of the great things about being single. I thought they’d make an excellent TT.

Thirteen Great Things About Being Single

1. Both sexes – You don’t have to answer to anyone.

2. Male – no one rolls their eyes when the remote accidentally sticks on the sports channel.

3. Male – You can clip your toenails without someone vomiting in the background.

4. Male – You don’t have to tell her she doesn’t look fat/her bottom’s not big/more than a handful is a waste.

5. Female – Everything smells clean and fresh. There are no lingering boy smells.

6. Female – You can change your mind every five minutes just for the hell of it.

7. Female – Fat days seem less important. So long as your stomach’s flat by Friday night, who cares if you’re bloated on Tuesday?

8. Female – You can talk on the phone all night about absolutely nothing and lie outrageously about how wonderful Susan looked in her new outfit without someone saying afterward, “But you told me she looked like mutton dressed up as lamb.”

9. Male – You don’t have to be nice to her stuck-up, snotty friends.

10. Female – You don’t have to explain why it’s essential to own 25 pairs of black shoes.

11. Male/Female – The toilet seat is exactly how you like it.

12. Male – No one tells you you’re driving too fast.

13. Male – You don’t have to battle past feminine apparel and toiletries just to get in the bathroom.

One extra because it made me laugh – Female – You can make your own smells without feeling unladylike.

Source: HOT LOVE(How to Get It) by Tracey Cox

Do you have any things to add to my list?

Today I’m participating in a mass blogging! WOW! Women on Writing has gathered a group of blogging buddies to write about family relationships. Why family relationships? We’re celebrating the release of Therese Walsh’s debut novel today. The Last Will of Moira Leahy: A Novel
(Random House, October 13, 2009) is about a mysterious journey that helps a woman learn more about herself and her twin, whom she lost they were teenagers. Visit the Muffin to read what Therese has to say about family relationships and view the list of all my blogging buddies. And make sure you visit www.theresewalsh.com to find out more about the author.

Family –there’s no doubt families can be fun, irritating, supportive, encouraging or they can be a pain in the neck, causing total misery. When it comes to families the saying the good, the bad and the ugly certainly fits.

My own family is complicated. My parents divorced when I was a teenager and that marital split changed the design of our family. I think this personal history shows its face in the sometime theme that shows up in my writing. I tend to write about people seeking security and often that security takes the form of a newly formed family. It might not be a traditional one, but it’s a family none the less.

Most of us would define a family as a group of persons with a common ancestry, but Webster’s dictionary says a family can also be a group of individuals living under one roof. That’s right! Individuals don’t need to be related to each other in order to become a tight-knit unit or family.

Robyn Carr writes the Virgin River series, which is one of my favorites. The first book Virgin River (Virgin River, Book 1) tells the story of Melinda Monroe, a nurse practitioner, who starts afresh in the township of Virgin River. It’s a small town and as the series progresses, it’s a joy to experience the sense of family that Robyn Carr evokes in her books. Only a few of the characters are blood relations but they learn to depend on each other in both good and bad times. This is to me what a family is about.

I have a new release called House of the Cat out on Wednesday. My hero Ryman Coppersmith is adopted into a loving family as a child. Unfortunately there’s jealousy bubbling under the surface, his stepbrother sets him up and he’s accused of a murder. Ry is forced to flee for his life. We first meet Ry several years later. During the passing years, he’s become captain of a spaceship. He’s a good man and tends to collect people who are down and in trouble. They usually end up as part of his crew, their loyalty to Ry and each other blending them into a family. When Ry decides it’s time to take revenge on his brother and clear his name, they’re there for him one hundred percent. Ry and his crew will do anything for each other. It’s all for one and one for all. A true family.

How would you define a family?

This week I read about a British couple who have recently celebrated eighty years of marriage. I think this is amazing. Their story inspired me to search for ways to make a marriage last through the years.

1. Spend at least 10 minutes a day focused on one another without the distraction of your kids, the TV, the phone etc.

2. Say I love you. My hubby will ring up and tell me just out of the blue. It always makes me feel good.

3. Affirm something your spouse said or did and say something nice.

4. Laugh together.

5. Don’t criticize your spouse.

6. Kiss your spouse in the morning, before leaving the house, when you go to bed, and several other times during the day and evening.

7. Do a few things together, like working in the yard, taking a walk, watching a favorite movie or planning and cooking dinner.

8. Fight fair.

9. Be willing to forgive.

10. Plan and have a date with one another.

11. Don’t try to change your spouse. Note – it doesn’t work! He can’t change me either.

12. Don’t expect your spouse to be a mind reader and don’t try to be a mind reader.

13. Accept that there will be some small issues that you two will never resolve and that it’s normal in successful marriages.

I’m sure there are heaps of other things I haven’t mentioned. If you have another suggestion, please add it in the comments section.