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Wednesday, November 4th, 2009
Guerrilla Signings by Elaine Viets

My special guest today is Elaine Viets who is celebrating the release of her new book The Fashion Hound Murders: Josie Marcus, Mystery Shopper. Elaine says on her website that pop princesses have accessory animals, dogs so small they’re carried in high-priced purses. These pedigreed pups are dressed like dolls in designer clothes, jeweled collars and tiaras. But this pretty fad feeds an ugly demand: Too many accessory animals are born in puppy mills. “The Fashion Hound Murders,” her fifth Josie Marcus mystery shopper novel, is about this pet subject. Though the subject is serious, this mystery has laugh-out loud adventure and an upbeat ending.

Today Elaine tells us about her experience at a book signing. Over to Elaine…

Elaine Viets and Blackie, a 1986 JaguarThe book signing sales were so-so. The chain store had done everything right: nice signs, a notice in the newsletter and a quiet place in the back to talk to readers. There were free cookies from the café, mostly uneaten. And a stack of unsold books.

“Must be the weather,” said the store manager.

Or the game on TV. Or some big event downtown. A so-so signing happens to every author. But I wanted to do something about it.

When the official signing was over, I asked the manager, “May I have a table by the door?”

“Why?” she said.

“Because I’m going to sell books,” I said.

We piled my books onto a V-cart and hauled them up front by the main door. We dragged over a table and a chair. I arranged my books on the table and my face into a smile. I was ready for the guerrilla signing – unplanned, unscheduled, no-holds-barred selling.

“Hi,” I said to the next customer through the door, “do you like mysteries?”

“No!” She scurried past as if I were trying to steal her purse.

But the second woman did like mysteries – especially new series. She bought a signed copy of my mystery, “High Heels Are Murder.”

The third woman said, “I’ll think about it.” I figured she was a lost cause, but ten minutes later she came back and bought a hardcover “Murder Unleashed” and a paperback “Shop Till You Drop.”

Guerrilla signings are not for the shy and sensitive. Expect rejection, even insults. “I don’t read genre crap,” sneered a woman.

The risks are worth it. If you like improv, you’ll have a good time – and so will your readers.The Fashion Hound Murders

“How much do you get if I buy the hardcover?” said a man.

“Me, personally?” I said.

“Yep.”

“About two bucks a book.”

“And if I buy the paperback?” he said.

“About sixty cents,” I said.

“What if I just gave you the sixty cents direct?” he said.

“That would take all the fun out of it,” I said.

He laughed and bought the hardcover.

That’s another thing you learn at guerrilla signings – men buy hardcovers. Maybe it’s because they make more money, or they don’t budget, but men are more likely to buy hardcover novels on impulse. Women will buy a paperback, but hesitate to give themselves the luxury of a hardcover. They will, however, buy the hardcover for a gift.

“I’ll give this to my mother,” said one woman. “After I read it first.”

“Not in the bathtub,” I said.

“Will my fourteen-year-old daughter like this book?” a worried mother asked.

“It’s the most stolen book at an East Texas high school library,” I said.

Mom bought the book.

“Can I buy the whole set?” said another woman.

“Yes, ma’m. These aren’t fish. There’s no limit.”

She laughed. “In that case,” she said, “I’ll take a set for me and one for my sister.”

“I’ll take a set, too,” said the woman behind her.

That’s another rule – the more you make people laugh, the more they’ll buy.

Guerrilla signings can also be humiliating and boring. Sometimes they don’t work. I’ve spent two hours answering questions about how to find an agent and pointing people toward the restroom.

But this time, the guerrilla signing was a success. I tripled my book sales. The store was delighted. And I had a good time. My favorite sale was to a man in his thirties with a boyish grin.

“If I buy this book, will it get me sex with my girlfriend?” he asked.

“I can’t say, sir. But I guarantee you’ll make one woman happy.”

He bought the book.

To learn more about Elaine’s Josie Marcus, Mystery Shopper series and her Dead-End Job series visit her website. You’ll also find excerpts for each of her books. The Fashion Hound Murders: Josie Marcus, Mystery Shopper came out on 3 November and is now available to purchase. Pick up your copy today!

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