Today is the last day of my Soldier of Fortune tour. I’m visiting Kaye Manro and talking about communication, the war zone and letter writing.
I’m also visiting Romance Roll Call where I have an interview.
Last year my younger sister was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. It’s a disease that affects the nerves and eventually sufferers end up in a wheel chair. At present there’s no cure. It was a shock to us all, and I really feel for her. We (the family) all suffer from a sense of helplessness because there is nothing we can do, except to offer help when it’s needed and to be available to listen when necessary.
She works in a bank, and since the world economy has declined, it has become a very stressful job. Not only do employers put pressure on staff to meet targets, but customers shout at the staff and expect them to work miracles. My sister has reduced her hours, but the week before last, a customer returned from overseas, went into the branch and shouted at her for twenty minutes nonstop. She’s good at her job, is efficient, and customers follow her whenever she moves to a new branch. She felt she hadn’t done anything wrong and was very upset when the branch manager and those higher up backed the customer. She was so upset it triggered her MS. Her shoulders ached, and when I rang her, she couldn’t get up to answer the phone. Her body didn’t work.
When we talked she said she was so disillusioned, she’d decided to hand in her notice. For her it was a matter of principle. I agreed. Last week she handed in her notice, and in the new year, she’ll start job hunting. She said it felt as if a weight had lifted from her shoulders, and after a couple of days off work plus a doctor’s visit, the pain faded. She’s getting around again and seems a little better, at least for now.
Last week the doctor told her about some new clinical trials for MS sufferers. Even though the trials won’t help her, she’s decided to participate in the hope the research and results will help others in the future.
I’ve discussed stress in the past. It’s is a terrible thing, and we all suffer from it at some point. I remember coming out in a full body rash because I was so worried about some upcoming exams. These days I’m fairly stress free. I’m a big believer in regular exercise. Go for a walk, take the kids to a nearby park and get some fresh air. It really does help reduce stress levels.
People who are under a great deal of stress feel as if their lives are out of control. If I ever get to this stage, I find that lists are a good idea. Write down all the things you need to do, prioritize and tick the items off one by one. A list really does help with a semblance of control.
For my sister, she needs to slow down a little. Hopefully, she will find an enjoyable job–one that won’t send her into meltdown. My fingers are crossed.
The run up to Christmas is usually busy and it can be stressful. What strategies do you use to cope with stress? And if anyone has experience with MS, do you have advice?
Related posts:
Oh that is sooo bad how the manager treated your sister. I do hope she finds a job in the New Year that she enjoys.
by Christina Phillips November 30th, 2009 at 5:00 amI’m sorry your sister is suffering with MS. I, too, hope she finds a job she enjoys.
I’ve always suffered from stress. During college, when I worked two jobs, I almost ripped my hair out. Today, I try to regroup by putting all the work and chores aside and playing with the children. At night, I try to take a nice, relaxing bath to calm down.
Sometimes, though, nothing relives stress better than a nice, heaping vent to a friend. But I save that for times when I really need to let it all hang out.
by Jaime November 30th, 2009 at 6:53 amShelley – I’m sorry to hear about your sister. To get a diagnosis of MS is not as bad as it once was. I’ve had the disease for nearly 20 years and didn’t have to stop teaching until 2005. I’m still walking and there may be a wheelchair in my future, but many MS sufferers never get to that point. Medicines have come leaps and bounds and they do indeed keep the disease from progressing. It’s a tough diagnosis, but there are diseases that are much worse.
Stress definitely will exacerbate the disease. And sometimes it’s just a matter of taking care of onesself. It’s such a shame your sister felt she had to give up her job especially if she enjoyed it and was good at it. I hope she finds something that is less stressful, but just as satisfying.
by Nina Pierce November 30th, 2009 at 7:13 amBlessings and hugs to your sister, Shelley.
I am high emotional person and thus have to find coping things to help with stress. Exercise is great– I dance in the studio. And try not to eat too much chocolate!
by Kaye Manro November 30th, 2009 at 8:01 amChristina – in truth the bank manager has been pretty good. His hands were tied to a certain extent. The customer had a lot of clout. It’s the old saying – money talks.
by Shelley Munro November 30th, 2009 at 1:00 pmJaime – stress seems to be a modern thing. We have all these time-saving gadgets and yet we’re all time poor. At least you know how to cope with your stress. That’s half the battle, I think.
by Shelley Munro November 30th, 2009 at 1:02 pmNina – Yes, that’s definitely true about there being much worse diseases lurking out there. I didn’t realize you had MS. It’s great that you’re doing well with meds etc.
With my sister, the MS has progressed really rapidly because of the amount of stress she’s under. I know she’s feeling happier now, and I’m confident she’ll find a job she loves. In some ways this is good because it gave her a fright, and I think she’ll try harder to keep the stress levels down.
by Shelley Munro November 30th, 2009 at 1:06 pmKaye – as I said to Jaime – knowing the situations that lead to stress really help because you’re able to react before the symptoms take over.
You know – chocolate isn’t that bad.
by Shelley Munro November 30th, 2009 at 1:07 pmI don’t know anything about MS but I have severe rheumatoid arthritis and stress is not good for that either. I try to keep my stress levels down, but family emergencies and regular life problems make it hard sometimes. I feel for your sister, nobody should be treated that way. And I’m sorry, but the customer is NOT always right. I worked a job once where we had a woman customer that came to pick up her order and it was wrong, she had ordered it wrong. She stood and cussed me and then stormed out without paying for her order. My boss came out of her office and told me in no uncertain terms was I ever to take that kind of abuse from a customer. If it ever came up again I had her permission to tell them to take their business elsewhere. Thankfully it never happened again.
by Linda Henderson November 30th, 2009 at 3:42 pmI hope your Sister Finds a Better Job.I have to make list all the time Because i for get thing.or I’m to busy to remember thing.but it helps to come me down two.
by stacey smith December 1st, 2009 at 12:50 amsasluvbooks(at)yahoo(dot)com
Linda – arthritis isn’t much fun either. I’m sorry to hear you suffer from it. I agree that the customer is not always right, and it’s great that your boss supported you.
Stacey – I’m a real fan of lists, and it gives me a great feeling of satisfaction when I can tick things off.
by Shelley December 1st, 2009 at 1:33 amI’m sorry to hear about your sisters MS. I hear stress can be really bad for that. I hope she can get rid of some of the stress in her life.
I have suffered from Panic disorder since I was 9 years old and no one ever understood why. So I try to stay out of highly stressful situations. I shop online for as much as possible…presents ect…and when I do have to go shopping I go either at 4 am or at 12 midnight because there’s no one at the store at that time and that really cuts down on the stress for me.
I have a really bad temper and will someone if they are getting on my nerves or in the instance of my dad, I stopped talking to him for 10 years because he drank so much it made him really mean. When he stopped drinking he was easier to be around and I am talking to him again.
Sometimes you have to cut the things out of your life that are stressing you out.
by Mary December 1st, 2009 at 3:50 pm